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The Authentic Eclectic
The Gerbil Incident
I wish I was making this shit up. I really do.
A few months before Christmas, my oldest asked if she could have a pet gerbil. I said no. We have dogs that would spend all day slavering over her doorknob to get in and eat the wee bastard. Thinking this was the end of it, I went about my business.
Flash forward to Wales this Christmas week. They are with their Dad for a week over Christmas and he has taken them shopping. Without considering anything at all, of any kind I imagine, he bought them both a gerbil. A gerbil each. Two gerbils, you see?
I then receive a pleading whatsapp video chat from the children demanding that I allow the gerbil here. In the background, I can see their Dad’s Patterdale terrier eyeing up the new housemates, licking her lips. I say “No, I’m sorry.” then ask to speak to their Dad.
He gets on the phone, laughing it up, as if this is all funny. I mean, it kind of is, but not for the gerbils or the children. It is funny to me that he thinks he can control my home that he isn’t part of. He never paid for anything we own. He has done fuck all for us. He is lucky he gets to see the girls. Despite his entirely pathetic attempts to interact with others, he does love them in his own way. Bless.